Other Awesome Cards

• When you sing, it sounds like an ugly person frowning.
• You seem a little tense.
• Your farmer's tan is showing.
• Your cellulite makes me hungry.
• Sorry we can't be friends because you're a dickhead.
• Thanks for not coming to work this week. I enjoyed doing both of our jobs.
• I want to touch your wiener.
• Let's chat about this some other time when you've brushed your teeth.
• If your penis were any smaller, it would be a penisn't
• Your glasses are your best feature.